DXP Bowl Extravaganza: Part 1, Take 6

Snow falling… Credit cards getting maxed out… Waking up next to a college girl home for the holiday… Snuggling with her at 7 a.m. wondering if you had to pay for her… Calling the strip club you were at last night to find out if your credit card is still there – better yet, if the card is still open… Gambling on the first week of bowl games… Finally… It’s Christmas!!

We have been doing extensive research for the bowl games and we will not only guarantee extremely hot college girls but also a few facts about some college football games that will pay for your Mom’s Christmas present AND your New Year’s Eve date. Hold on, I am starting to get some Alec Baldwin Schweaty Balls making guarantees like that….enjoy the best SNL video of all time outside Chris Farley until we get back.

‘Take the Double Extra Points’
Regular Season Final: 73-66-1 (53%)
Bowl Season: ?!?!?!?!!!!!!

(NOTE: ON A 5 STAR SYSTEM)

SAMMY VEGAS

NEW MEXICO BOWL
4* NEW MEXICO (-3) over Nevada: Who better to send to the New Mexico Bowl than New Mexico? That’s like sending me to play at the Razzle Dazzle – although you would like to think your friends don’t think you play there that much, it is in reality your home field and you’re quite comfortable. Nevada has come around this season after the #2 Dual-Threat QB Kaepernik was inserted and has now accumulated 19 TDs/3Ints and was the WAC Fr. of the Year. Although Nevada was impressive the last 3 games in which one they lost to Hawaii by 2 at home, they are getting way too many points. New Mexico has better wins and a much better defense. Did I mention they are at home?

NEW ORLEANS BOWL
2* FLORIDA ATLANTIC (-3) over Memphis: Captain Kangaroo and the Owls will fly to New Orleans to take on the Memphis Tigers. Wow. A thriller. That’s where gambling comes in. Opponents just can’t take Capt. Kangaroo and his Owls serious as he is 8-2 ATS his last 10 games. This guy did beat Tom Osborne with an inferior team and he’ll beat Memphis here with a superior team. FAU’s QB Rusty Smith has 3352 yards and 27 TDs on the season and Memphis’ QB Martin Hankins has 2939yards and 22 TDs on the season. Points will be scored, drinks will be had on Bourbon St., and the Memphis girls will be groped. That takes money and that’s why we take FAU.

LAS VEGAS BOWL
2* UCLA (+6.5) over BYU: UCLA won the first game this year between these two teams 27-17 where the Bruins outgained BYU by almost 200 yards of offense. UCLA has lost their coach, lost the last 4 out of 5, and in fact, was asked by the Las Vegas Bowl that they decline their bid for Cal to take their place. No dice. UCLA has QB Ben Olson back at 100% as well as a slew of others who looked great vs. USC. In an interesting side note, interim HC and DC Walker once coached at BYU and in fact played with BYU head coach Mendenhall who are both candidates for the UCLA job. Who do you think the players will want? The Stormin’ Mormon’s QB’s name is Max Hall. Upon getting accepted to BYU, he agreed to change it to Hall from Load. Apparently, girls in Utah wouldn’t get it.

TIMMY ROSE

MOTOR CITY BOWL
4* PURDUE (-8) over Central Michigan: Let me get this one straight: Purdue beat Central Michigan by 23 points as a 22 point favorite back in September after leading 38-0 in the 3rd quarter and are giving up just over a touchdown 3 months later? I said the same thing a few weeks ago as UCF blew out Tulsa for the 2nd time this year and won all of you DXPers a solid $5. While the first game was in West Lafayette, there is no reason to expect a different result in the dome in Detroit. Purdue had over 400 yards in that game . . . by halftime. It was almost as if the Chippewas were being coached by Kevin Cosgrove. By the way, did he get an NAIA coordinator job yet? You won’t see many seasons where a team loses by 30 at home to North Dakota State and is rewarded with a bowl game. Expect another blowout in this one as Purdue will move the ball at will against the over-rated MAC champion.

HAWAII BOWL
3* BOISE STATE (-10.5) over East Carolina: HC Peterson and the Broncos can’t wait to return to the islands and get at least partial redemption for the Nov 23rd loss to Hawaii that decided the WAC title. Meanwhile, I fully expect East Carolina’s necks to be more worn out than Dr. D’s after freshman orientation in Bloomington from scoping all of the talent on the beaches near Aloha Stadium. The Broncos have huge edges on both sides of the ball, give up just 20 points per game and 325 yards per game, yet have not faced the level of competition that the Pirates have (6 bowl teams including W. Virginia and V. Tech). East Carolina has covered 3 straight as a dog, but we’ll go with the better defense and the more explosive offense playing with a chip on their shoulder.

PAPAJOHNS.COM BOWL
2* Southern Miss/Cincy UNDER (56): Many of you will be tempted to take Cincy in a blowout over Southern Miss in this one, but keep in mind that Birmingham, AL is not exactly where the Bearcats were hoping to play the week before losing to West Virginia. Cincy was the most fortunate team in all of college football in terms of turnover margin and lead the country in INTs with 23. Southern Miss lead Conference-USA allowing just 23 points per game and under 140 rushing yards per game. The Golden Eagles should have the larger crowd and will be fired up to play for recently fired Coach Bower. Cincy’s defense has been solid all year giving up just 100 yards per game rushing and less than 19 points per game. We don’t see a lot of big plays in this one and will go with the under.

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